dumb is the only word for me,i think.

how dumb can i ever get.to get trapped again n again.making the same mistake twice is the worst thing one can ever do.hurting myself so much while they jux seem so unaffected.if i'm nt dumb then what am i.pure stupidity.it jux isn't worth it isnt it,bt there's no better way to rid the pain,other than...

putting on a facade is hard,putting up a stong front is even harder.
and for the first time ever,on the ph w ah ma,2hrs non stop,it jux~~~~
really cant control anymore.
thks,ahma!=)

ah ma keep saying 'with no expectations, there wun be any disappointments' but it's really easier said that done.bt other than blaming myself,who can i blame.its all my fault ah.for being sooooo dumb n everything.it was all my choice ah.right frm the beginning,if i chose to stay at sr,things could have been much better.bt i'm glad there's sotongs.so,it's just all my fault.

what am i supposed to do now.i really dunno.the pain is really unbearable,torturing,excruciating!

LOST~~~


today is a bad day.
early morn get pissed off by irritating ppl.stupid.
really dunno wads their prob,despite my hostility,their skin still remains thick.forever toking nonsense n asking dumb qns.maybe their brain's really filled with grass!irritaing!already down with blocknose,getting sick,still hv to go sch for stupid gp test,then end up before lessons started proper,they spoiled my entire day!
and someone was jux laughing n commenting n asking bout some stuff which made me super frustrated also!omg.what a GREAT monday!or izzit jux monday blues~~whatever it is,i know i jux cant stand these ppl~they better dun come near me n spoil my day again if nt i dunno what i'm going to yell at them.

irritated by myself too..always getting jux flu or blocknose,feel like falling sick..bt end up,there's always no fever!!meaning i still hv to go sch despite nt feeling well!dumb.bt,since today was a bad day,i din care,and i went home aft chem.then the irritating headache is here,n i slept frm 3+ to 6+!!bt the headache seems to be worse now.oh man.totally no mood,and suddenly 3 small tests popped out for tml??and so much work to be done!=(
shall use the outing n big dinner this coming wkend as motivation~~


2nd post of the day!since i'm so not up to date.hahahax.

last fri,went to mich 21's bday chalet..then had the first night cycling experience..n nt slping till the next day morning..survived without any slp for more than 24hrs??plus,i had sch till so late on fri lar..21 looks real old le,and in 2 yrs time,it'll be our turn..sounds quite fun ah..mich parents each gave her a silver n gold key necklace..meaning she's a grown up now??though she really dun look like her age..hahax.n the bday cake was a huge rabbit!when they were going to cut the cake,the kids were saying dont cut the rabbit,n they were like going to cry lar..until the small boy asked them to shut up..hahahax.so funny lar.the cut rabbit cake,looks bit gross..hahahx.

oh,then dearest auntie vic was making plans for her 21st bday celeb already!!when her 19th bday is nt even over yet..then she was telling everybody mux come to her party,if nt later nobody..n best of all!!she was deciding the menu for the party!and was asking me to ask my mum help her cook all the nice nice food!!omg lar..then we were walking away from her,trying to ignore the 'crazy' person!hahahahx.AUNTIE VIC!remember ah,i wan be the VIP,if nt i dun wan go le..hahahx. oh,n dearest blur vic,was happpily drinking her packet lemon barley,and saying y izzit gassy(y the spelling looks weird??hahax.),then i tot her tastebuds gt sth wrong..and she kept saying its gassy,so aft awhile,when i finally tried her drink!i almost want to faint!!hahahahx.it tasted so not lemon barley ah,obviously,there was sth wrong with the drink ah..all our lemon barley tasted normal,except for auntie vic's..think the barley over ferment or wad,and it was really gassy.when the others tried the drink they almost fainted too lar..the taste is so horrible!!and auntie vic had been drinking it happily lar!and say she thought diff brand lemon barley tasted diff..*Faintsfaints* the taste was far too weird le lar!if i nv try her drink,i think she would have finished the whole pack.hahahax.

then we were slacking in the room,watching tv..n was laughing at how korean shows are always so slow,always the same ending,always so sad..comparing it to another show,the korean show was like really sooo slow!hahhax.then around 12, we finally set off for night cycling!!n before tt we had mac ice cream at such a late time!bt,dun care.tt's y i say auntie vic's influencing me to becum a glutton too.hahhahax.

so...we cycled from downtown to zay's house which was quite near..she wanted to get another bike cux there wasn't enought,end up she cant find her key,n she went home to slp.hahahx.sooooo...we cycled from downtown all the way to CHANGI VILLAGE!!!actually was jux searching for the next 7-11,then can buy drinks then can go back le..bt ended up,there was no more along the way,so go all the way to changi village.quite unbelievable tt we actually found our way there n managed to cycle up the slopes n survived the long long journey there.though the night breeze was cooling,still ended up sweating!hahahx.and the breeze made my eyes so dry,until the contacts in my one eye was almost dropping,so some parts while cycling,i had to close one eye!hahahax.so,aft bout an hour plus??we finally reached our destination.bought eyedrops if nt dunno how to survive on the long journey back.and we decided to become 'alcoholics'?hahahx.vic n i had hooch n ahma had long island t,10% alc lar!dun dare drink too high alc content,later rly drunk then anyhow blabber nonsense ah..hahahx.bt end up i think i drank too fast,then i was supper red!!and felt giddy too,heart beating super fast also.bt not drunk lar.hahahx.so,quickly drank lots of water,if nt later cycle halfway then lose balance ah..hahahx.ah ma better still,her 10% alc really make her red n giddy too??hahahx.then at first,she had to push her bike lar!hahahx.

the journey back was better n more fun though still feeling giddy n scared lose balance,bt i survived,never fall down!hahahax.went up slopes and down a long slope,so fun~~bt it was real tiring.hahahax.so,we were back at downtown at 3+??then we decided to have macs!hahax.auntie vic only had apple pie n ah ma had fries..while i had mcnuggets meal!!glutton-ish!!bt after awhile,it was breakfast le..so sq they all came too n had breakfast,N ahma n vic had breakfast too!!hahahx.so i'm nt tt glutton afterall!=p and,auntie vic suddenly realised she had a bottle of eyedrops in her pocket!!tsk.

after tt,went back to the chalet.then since mich frens was slping already.we had no place to slp..hahahx.so went down to play cards,played daidi,which i totally sucked at..hahahx.so,end up the loser had to drink abit less than half a small cup of the long island t??n obviously,i kept losing,so had to drink the super disgusting taste alc,keep drinking until wan to vomit lar.cant believe ah ma finish one whole bottle herself.omg lar.i wun wan to touch tt drink ever.hahahax.at first already woke up from the hooch le..nt red anymore..then the 10% long island t,made me red and hot all over again!n my heart was beating even faster and i could hear it so clearly lar!n i thought it was abit hard to breathe too.so scary.then some ppl scared i getting drunk.then we changed game.so,played till the whole bottle was finished,n i think i finished half the bottle!and some ppl accidentally spilled the drink,n my whole leg n shoes all got the smelly drink.so er xin.

went up to wash up,n when i look into the mirror,so shocked lar!!face was really really red,worst than jux now,like my whole head bursting!hahhahax.then some ppl came to check on me,scared i angry or wad ah..hahahx.then i was blaming him,bt he say if he nv spill the drink,then i would have had to drink tt cup too.quite true ah.hahahx.luckily i din get real drunk n start toking rubbish..was jux really blurred,n laid there,nv tok much,listening to them tok,and enjoying the moment of 'relaxation' and...hahahx.while xy,sq they all cont to tok..n ah ma was practically laughing aft every sentence lar!!the after effects of the drink..haiyo..hahahx.oh,forgot to mention,auntie vic was totally dead when we were back at the chalet.so she jux slept at the table.then left soon when there was first bus!hahahx.so we survivied till 7++..then went back to chalet to slp awhile till 10++??i slept like less than 1hr lar..then cant slp le,cux my stomach was feeling weird,and HUNGRY too!hahhahax.so i went out to sit lor..then felt weird,so quickly went back to the toilet,and...vomitted lor..all becux of the stupid drinks!!luckily,the vomit taste din hv much of the disgusting taste of the drink..hahahahx.think this is the first time i drank so much alcohol in one day lar!!really like some alcoholic lar!hahahx.

then returned the bikes.went subway for lunch.n headed home.was really slping like a log on the bus lar!hahahax.then the rest of the day,was feeling super super slpy,due to the super lack of slp n the hangover effect from the alc ba..so..tt's it,my first night cycling experience,n first time being so 'alcoholic'!=p

surprise the next day,n it was then did i realised some things.hahah.=p



our bikes!




'not yet drunk' ah ma poses for my camera!hahahx.


auntie vic n i was about to take pic,then ah ma who was on the ph saw and squeezed in!tsk tsk.hahahax.


the alcoholics.


us.


even my hands was super red too!!


look at how red i become,compared to auntie vic!my red red ears!bloodshot eyes too??
hahahax.1st time drink until so horrible.


almost drunk ah ma!


w sq,daughter.


sq poses for the camera too!


half wake ah ma.


super,duper,ultra delayed post!hahahax.

everyone's saying my blog's dead.hahax.too lazy and also no time to update bout the sooooo many things tt happened over the past few weeks.plus,my mum's addicted to viwawa..and is sitting infront of the com almost all the time..so,how can i post..hahahx.before she's here to snatch my com..shall post as long as i can!hahahax.=p

tioman's pics nt ready yet..so nx time then post bout tt..it seems soooo long ago already lar..bt for memories sake,i shall post it some day!hahax.

the dreadful MYE was finally over last fri!first time i felt so horrible during exam period,and time seem to crawl past sooooo slowly!!really felt like dying,even before the pps actually started lar!was sooooooooooo emo n sianded when came back frm tioman n had to go back to study..really thought i was getting depression..luckily, i survived the ordeal!though,results are bad..i shall take it as a valuable lesson,AND MOVE ON AND CONTINUE TO FIGHT THIS WAR!!prelims here i come~~ mux be brave and take on come what may.with all the naggings and motivations! =)=)=)

so..the long awaited long wkend ended jux like tt ah..bt it really was one of the most eventful and busy wkend!!hahahx.really played and enjoyed throughout.

fri,right after last bio mcq paper.chiong home to change,prepare..then go facial!hahax.it wasn't to destress or wad ah..cux go there jux suffer only..felicia squeezed all my pimples with all her might like nobody business!!sooo long nv go...tt's y gt so many to squeeze,sooo pain until i was tearing like crazy!hahax.n i was so noisy,until the ppl outside came in to see lar!omg.hahahax.got to relax abit while having the mask on!i fell aslp and even was dreaming!!hahahax.=p aft tt,my face was like so red n horrible lar!!bt who cares,i'm nt going to stay at home..went home to prepare then went to meet kengx,man,bt for dinner at suntec.then man n bt had to go for some briefing for their odac camp at esplanade,so had to wait for them before dinner.bt i was already super hungry ah..then went carrefour buy so much sushi n eat and also bought the nice nice choc cake!feel like a glutton!!omg.hahax.

walked over to citylink to eat at new york new york.and we ended up having our dinner very late ah..so late le bt still need queue up..then at the entrance there cux gt ppl use the table then there was 4 chairs there..then the person ask us go sit there n wait..then we were like facing n looking the ppl in the restaurant eating lar..SUPER WEIRD and DUMB ah!look outside also weird,look inside also weird!then we were like keep laughing lar!omg.hahax.had pork chop.the name was sth piggy i forgot,so cute lar.hahax.think new york's western food is my fav among the other nice restaurant.not forgetting amk s11 fish n chips!hahax.




SAT!
woke up early again.then went to meet auntie vic for nice nice fishball noodles,make her contacts,bubble tea.then went down to giodano warehouse sale!hahahax.we very pro ah..found our way to the ulu place..and we spent like almost 2hrs in tt small area shopping crazily~~hahahx.supposed to meet xy,wh at expo at 2+??bt ended up dragged till so late..hahax.then when we reached expo,was walking to the hall 5..we pass by a wedding booth,then outside gt those wedding albums,then i saw my breadtalk cashier head wedding pics!then was looking through..until auntie vic was saying we still haven have our photoshoot..then the person came n ask us in lar..hahahax.so we were like sitting there as if we're getting married!so embarrasing.then we were asking bout the photoshoot,soo long until xy they all called ah..then when we told them wad we were doing,they were sooo SHOCKED!!hahahax.then we were sitting there,waiting for them to come ah,then i was sooo scared bout how ah ma will react!!hahahax.n the first thing wh said when she saw us was..'are u all getting married?!'hahahahahax.super funny can!!then we ended up discussing the stuff and the price was $80 per person.thought it was quite ok,cux think outside price is like 100++..so had to call the other sotongs to see if they wan..then shing was hard to convince!so scary to call her n ask lar!everybody also scared to ask her..keep passing the ph around,n the person even toked to shing!hahahax.end up she n xh still din agree when we say we shall pay for them as their bday present!we're still not done persuading them yet.=( cant wait for the photoshoot!so exciting can!hahahax.though ahma wun agree to wear the dress,she might be wearing suit??traditional costumes??or whatever u can think off except for dress..hahahax.n the causual shot is going to be more fun!auntie vic n shing wear cavewoman costume??or sy n shing in bananas in pyjamas costumes??pokemon..whatever..so fun!!!!!waiting~~

then shopped again at john little sale..bought sy present..then went to citylink again.bought hy present.then home,finally.hahahax.

SUN!
woke up SUPER early again,for the mission impossible made possible by us-baking of sy n hy bday cake!hahahax.dearest breast fren house is so far!need to sit 81 sooo long!then the two aunties went to ntuc to shop for all the necessary stuff..n two gluttons bought sushi too!all the little ingredients added up to bout 60+ lar..since we made two cakes..so one cake is like worth $30??hahahx.then we really look like aunties carrying all the stuff..and auntie vic chiong to mac so we can buy mac breakfast.hahax.

then took bus back.then had the macs inside auntie vic's parents room..hahahax.and super glutton vic haven finish her macs then she eat her sushi le!!mux be dearest breast fren influence me too much le!i'm like really eating more n more lar!until i think i'm spending too much on food!CONTROL!then we started baking our FLOURLESS cake!my first time baking a cake!really long n tiring process lar!sooo hot also.bt it was fun.hahax.esp the breaking eggs part..supposed to separate the egg white n egg yolk..mine was quite messy..auntie vics was better still!!!soo mixed up until both look like egg yolk..then still trying to scoop some egg yolk out of the egg white.hahahax.so,as expected,the first one was badly done.cux vic sis din set the oven properly n all the heat was on the top of the cake only.so..the top was totally BLACK!!bt the inside tasted nice.so we started on our sec attempt.as soon as we put it in the oven..we went to expo to walk again!since we had to fetch jul,so jux go walk walk again lor..hahahax.n someone said she wasnt going to spend..end up still spent!hahahax.n i bought over 50+ again..shopping is always never enough lar!=p

then aft jul came,we WALKED back!n i nv complain hor..instead,it was jul who was complaining..cux auntie vic bluffed tt its a 1hr walk!hahahax.then jul started making her cookies..and dearest best fren n i were too busy decorating the cake~~so fun lar!hahahx.so jul was complaining nobody help her..hahahax.n the oven was bad.the cookies had to be baked sooo long..n glutton jul was eating here n there..as she was putting raisins on the cookies,she'll pop one,another one,and many more in her mouth!hahahx.oh!!the cake tt everybody eat on mon also gt jul saliva!!hahahx.cux she was using the fork to eat the previous cake,n was biting onto the fork..then aft tt she was using the fork to poke the new cake to see if its ok!!n she still use the fork to try 'dig' out some chao da part!hahahax.then,took bus home again.n i was dozing off on the bus..hahax.n some ppl sms keep waking me up!hahahx.so,there goes another day~~

working hard~~


the process~~

look at my ugly pokka dots hand!stupid sandflies!=(


look at how hard dearest breast fren is working!hahax.


and look at how 'gentle' she is!
dearest breast fren!!mux cheer up,jiayous ok,i'm always here.=p




re-baking in the process~~


ta da!wad a NICE cake for the first attempt!like omg lar.hahahax.=p


BUT..look at our end product!!yays.though initially it looked quite ugly,and was breaking apart.bt with all the decorations,it looked presentable!and jul said the m n n's make it look like disco.


bakers of the day~


the lazy cat we saw at the bus stop!slping until so shuang!hahax.


MON!!
woke up SUPER early again again!for the BIG day at wild wild wet!!hahahx.=p actually wanted to take bus there,tt's y wake up so early..then when my aunt come le,we decided to take the car since my big sis nv go.so dumb,cux its still so early like 8+..and we were meeting my cousin's fren,admirer,andre n family at 10 there..hahax.so went kovan had some breakfast then go down..end up still early..hahax.bt andre they all were earlier.and some ppl was last,because he stay at ulu place!hahahx.

quite a new experience,with andre they all and...but still it was super fun!he played till so crazy with my cousins they all,like small kid like tt lar!play with the small kids until like he same age as them!and he even injured his arm there without knowing lar!haiyo.then we were like racing in the shiok river!cousins they all were on the float..then he was pushing them,then i was pushing another cousin..so dumb lar but fun lar.hahahax.oh man,we even sat the bicycle thingy,so dumb can..bt the becux of the company,its less dumb.hahahax.=p=p=p really an enjoyable day,where all the worries was gone for awhile,pure relaxation.but now,its back to reality already.waiting for more good to come aft alvls!all the treats someone owe me!=p=p

then evening was sy n hy bday celeb!so from pasir ris had to go to clark quay..which was such a long journey again!but nvm,some 'kind hearted soul' scared i this road idiot get lost and said it was on his way,n went with me to clark quay.though i doubt its on the way,cux it's like go one big round?then dunno how he change to go back to red line.bt nevertheless,=)=)=p.

had dinner at fisherman's wharf.quite nice place..bt no aircon..hahahax.n i agree with auntie vic!s11's fish n chips are still the best!since newton circus meeting in march,din hv a full sotong clan meeting till tt day.had so much fun n laughter,toking n toking.n then shing,xy,jul,hy n sy even enetertained us with the banana dance??hahahax.super funny lar!those not doing it was like so busy filming them,like some paparazzi lar!oh oh..not forgetting the big showdown.our cake!hahahax.sy initially believe us..n rly thought tt we bought the ugly cake from nydc.then she was saying we cant be so pro,make the cake so tasty.until she tasted some burnt parts,then she realised.hahahax.the cake's nice!all thanks to our hard work n sweat!=p

on the way home.surprisingly,some ppl msg to see if i was still there.then still bluff me he still there lar..so dumb.then i already below my blk..then he called ah.then i realised he bluff,cux the background so quiet!!i'm pro.hahahax.=p=p chat awhile,then time to go back up,get ready for sch the next day and face the music.

what a great wkend huh.=p=p=p


the sooo BEAUTIFUL cake once again.the strawberries look soo pinkish n fake here.hahax.=p


our dinner.


the bday gals.n look at wad xh n shing is doing behind.trying to 'hide' from the camera!hahahx.


my fellow glutton sotong,blur shing.


look at wad they are trying to do..playing peek-a-boo ah..





unglam sy~caught on camera while doing the banana dance!hahahx.


jul alphabet cookies.


dearest sotong family!oh,when the person help us take the pic,she started couting,1,2,3..then the way she say was soooo funny..then jul n me was trying to control nt to laugh out,till sound weird sound came from behind!stupid ahma lar!she cant control le,then made the weird laugh sound..super funny lar!hahahx.


and jul was blowing bubbles while crossing the road!

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